Dear Hypocrite,

...I think you dropped your mask.

Here…you dropped your mask.

A moment of silence for man and his hypocrisy. Really. We need to be given medals for the way we react to every issue that tickles our interest. 

I was passing by a newspaper stand on Kill-Time Street the other day, and I met a bunch of men, (let’s call them Vs) arguing about what I assume to be politics or life issues. It’s always an interesting sight - how everyone suddenly knows the rituals, hidden and unspoken secrets of life when they start to speak. You’d think they - not God - were in control of man’s existence.

But i noticed something i couldn’t quite make sense off. A group of men in suits came by every once in a while, shut the Vs up, argued on the same issue heatedly for about 2 hours, re-arranged their fits, and then moved on like nothing ever happened. Wow! This happened about three to four times while I stood. These ‘educated folks’ just came to escalate the issues, wail about it, some even fighting, and - like a joint timer in all their minds - they moved on to the next newspaper stand, only a devoted few staying to show concern.

There and then, I learnt two, maybe three things. First, you’re only relevant as long as you’re alive. Second, the world doesn’t care about you, and you don’t care about the world either (no matter how much you claim to). Every actual victim is V, and every other person is a suited nosey passerby, disguising under genuine concern. Swallow the bitter pill to come, and please, hate me. 

“R.I.P, Imole”. “Justice for Mohbad”. “Naira Marley scandal”. We remember this, don’t we? Some even went as far as protesting on the streets for him, digging up rumors and spreading the most ridiculous stories about his parents and his life. I even heard that his corpse was dug up. Everyone wanted Naira Marley in jail, everyone wanted to expose the music industry for the ‘despicable things they do’ to their artists. The internet was on fire for weeks, and Mohbad trended for a month, or more? I’m not sure. People very unrelated to him, cried and posted videos but who remembers him today? Who mentions his songs or says his name? Maybe once in a while you’d come across a tribute to him while scrolling on tiktok or hear his song on a reel, but to tell the truth, he quickly sunk into oblivion as soon as he died. The heat, protests and fame ended as quickly as it had started. Apparently, nosey passersby went to ‘Mohbad’s newspaper stand’, and took over the debate from those it truly concerned - his family, and the industry. When their interest died down, they moved on, changing interest like Mohbad never existed. RIP Imole. 

The Russian-Ukraine war was another continental topic. Oh, we had a swell time with this one! Our then President almost put us in trouble, when he decided to pick a side and contemplated sending innocent, clueless soldiers, instead of just bringing our own there back home, however hellish it has become. But better in hell, than dead. Really. Africans were vying for the liberation of their brothers from the ‘wicked oppression of the whites’. Patriotism was at a rise. The world suffered a shortage of whatever the hell it was Ukraine produced, and more reasons to hate colonialism popped up everyday. People posted and reposted, shared videos, argued and turned to degree owning historians overnight but where is all that support now? Dead. You’d think the whole of Africa was going to war for Ukraine when it first happened. But has the conflict ended? No. Have people stopped talking about it? Yes. Matter of fact, Vs in Ukraine are in Day 771 of the ongoing war as i write this piece, but we don’t hear them anymore because nosey passerbys like you went to hijack the debate from them, and moved on when it got boring. This is even worse than Mohbad’s scenario ‘cause these people aren’t even dead yet, still the support vanished as soon as it came. Again.

Next up, the Israel-Hamas war. But, before I comment on this one, I respect ish your opinion, and I expect you to respect ish mine. The Israel-Hamas war took the world by not so much a surprise. We saw it coming, and it's a huge wonder to me how Israel has managed to remain relevant down the decades. Israel has been at war, even before I was born. I met it, I grew up with it and I might die before it ends - If it ever ends. Israel with Palestine, Israel with Arab, Israel with Iraq, the Hitler Genocide, Black September (good read, by the way), October 7, 2023 attack against them. Just list any epic war with an Islamic nation or in history, and you’d find Israel there. 

But you know the people I find the most ‘interesting’ of all? Those outside the war, who stay at the newspaper stand and debate like they are directly affected. “Free Palestine” “#End Hamas”, “I Stand With..”… and the list goes on. But this newspaper stand is even more interesting than the previous two. In this stand, you’d find four kinds of people. First, the actual victims; second, passersbys who just need something to banter about; third, people who are in support of humanity and choose to pick no side or pick a side; fourth, those who pick a side and claim religion has nothing to do with it. It's quite a colorful stand, don’t you agree? Different shades of hypocrisy, especially the second, and fourth kinds of passersbys. 

This is my opinion: I believe one of the silliest lies anyone outside the war can tell you, is that they support who they support, with religion not being a factor, however minute. I heard of how a man stabbed his 8 year old Muslim tenant and his mum, being driven by the war. A Muslim lady also told me she doesn’t mind the whole of Israel - kids, civilians and all - being wiped out ruthlessly in this war. Look around. More muslims, if not all support Palestine, Christians, the ones who choose to take a stand, are more inclined towards Israel. It is religious. Cut the crap about humanity, you don’t care!

If we don’t post about it, it's because we unwillingly chose to not be part of the nosey Passersbys. We’re honestly not trying to start another war outside the actual war. When happenings of the war started, everyone's status turned to a news blog. “Hamas kills 8 Israeli babies”. “Israel bombs hospitals and health centers”. “Hamas kills Israeli soldiers, rapes the women”. “Israel cuts off food supply to Palestine”. And it went on and on and on till it stopped. A devoted few post about it every once in a while, but the initial heat it started with drastically died down as soon as it had risen. Why? Because we’re not in the war with them. It doesn’t directly affect us. We don’t care as much as we claim to. 

And it’s the same thing everywhere. We hear a rape case - we show pity, spread the information, then move on. A man is killed - we show sympathy, spread the information and move on. Abortion is legalised - we show concern, maybe debate, and move on. That’s life. A meticulous waste of time, from one newsstand to the next. You only have the chance to be relevant as long as you’re breathing. It doesn’t guarantee you would be or stay relevant; breathing just gives you greater chances of being relevant. Even suicide victims are easily forgotten. Not to blaspheme, but even science says the idea of God would slowly disappear, as man advances. I hope I'm dead before then, but you get the gist. 

I’m basically trying to say two things. 

1. It’s hard. For everyone. You don’t bear the weight of the world (Jesus did that already), but it's not to invalidate whatever bullshit the universe is bringing at you. But, if you do vye for change, for growth and all those motivational stuff people say, the first step is simple and basic. Try to stay alive. Try hard. 

2. While breathing, don’t waste that breath. Seriously, it’s not eternal. It’s as limited as the fucks you have to give. Stop hopping on the latest news, trolling celebrities who have enough resources for generations to come, engaging in every ‘interesting’ gossip you hear, taking everything too deeply like you were actually directly affected. If it’s clear you’d move on from it in less than 2 months, or even weeks from the issue, why spend 2 hours of your life you’d never get back arguing like the same life depends on it? 

For the ‘high’, for the ‘vibes’, maybe. But, foundationally, it's a waste of time. Is it bad to have an opinion on things? Definitely not. That’s why ‘newsstands’ exist in the first place. You go visit, pick a paper, and may choose to stay and discuss whatever. No knowledge, I believe, is wasted. But flee from quarrel, squabble, arguments (whatever it's called), like a virus. It feels good to be heard, that’s why arguments are so addictive but more often than not, you won’t remember the root cause or main point of the issue by sunset. Moreover, time is money and you can’t get enough of either. 

It’s perfect to have a thought on all things, but know the extent to which you want to magnify, brood and share those thoughts. Being picky about your concerns is an underrated steeze. And while the Israel-Hamas war is very important (most especially for those actually there), we need to figure out how to get Tinubu out of that seat before he drives us to poverty and insanity. There’s always an issue directly affecting you, give those the greatest attention. Be opinionated, not eristic or better still, neither. Frankly, after all the cheap talk, you gain nothing but a headache and wasted time. I know a place they give paracetamol for free, though. 

You’re welcome.